Thursday, January 14, 2010

On Gambling

Ben:

Wagering on thoroughbred horse racing is something I enjoy very much, although I am well aware of the potential dangers of excessive gambling. I appreciate it most because unlike other forms of gambling, horse race handicapping involves a high level of skill and intellect. From the time I first went to Penn National Racecourse at the age of 6 to my current summer trips to Monmouth Park on the Jersey Shore, I’ve always enjoyed horse racing….win or lose. The ability to decipher what sets one horse apart from 8 others is not something that happens overnight; rather, you must spend hours preparing for a trip to the racetrack to ensure a reasonable chance of success. That being said, my grandmother was addicted to slot machines (an activity that seems to require very little skill), and was successful at it. I had nothing but respect for my grandmother and she was one of the greatest influences in getting me interested in horse racing, but I would never dream of spending hours at slot machines pissing money away. However, I think people should be free to spend their money in whatever way they choose. In fact, I hope people continue to pound money into slot machines, being that the profits from many casinos help fund horse racing at adjacent racetracks.

Bilz:

People probably expect me to quote some Bible verse as evidence that gambling is a sin, but then we should need to discuss the philosophical foundations and implications of sin—too long for this post. Instead, let us consider the intellectual merits of gambling. In short, if you’re like me, gambling is stupid, really stupid. It seems whenever I bet, the Olympian Pantheon immediately conspires against me; consequently, I do not gamble. I suppose if one is good, gambling is then profitable, in which case one is being a good steward with his money, but most people are not good, and people lose more often than they win (which is why the House stays in business), so I would say that in general, it is unwise for a given person to gamble…unless, of course, you are betting against me, in which case it is very wise for YOU to gamble!

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Cats or Dogs?

Bilz:

Cats or dogs, which are better? One’s choice says more about oneself than about the animal in question. For domestic camaraderie, it is clear why the canine is the populists’ choice, or should we say, the choice of the unwashed masses. With intellect extending little beyond frivolous stunts which elicit complementary responses from their masters, and with behavior rarely exceeding the slobber-blathering decorum of circus clowns, dogs certainly are more socially accessible initially. Yet it is the feline which has commanded the respect of sentient beings stretching back to the monarchs of antiquity. If they are not immediately sociable, it is because they possess a healthy intellectual skepticism and refuse to grovel at the whims of human companions. Yet when one is willing to expose his heart’s deepest vulnerabilities, Man and Cat then enter into an almost spiritual relationship, to love and be loved, heart to heart, soul to soul.

Ben:

Clearly, the choice is dogs. A dog is always happy to see its owner and its love is unconditional. A cat, on the other hand, looks at you in a calculating way as if it is the superior being. A dog is fine with sitting next to you on the couch while you watch television or read...a cat needs attention and rubs against your leg to alert you of that fact. When a dog does something stupid, it’s funny because it likely doesn’t know any better...but when a cat knocks over the vase, you get the sense that it may have been a planned move. If animals could talk, this would be a matter of whether you’d prefer to be greeted by the wide-eyed lovable dog saying, “Yessssss! Good to see my best friend again!” or the spiteful cat who says “give me attention, you dumb prick.” Besides, in the words of an esteemed peer of mine, “puppies are cute as shit.”